It's Raining... finally

I don't often get homesick, but this last week with the bushfires has been particularly bad. It all seems so hopeless here - water is running out; the powers-that-be seem powerless to take any real action (and banning me from watering my lettuces doesn't count); these monster bushfires that cover the state with thick yellow smoke. Everything's so dead and yellow.

I've been here nearly 7 years. And it's nearly 7 years to the day (Christmas Day, in fact) when I realised what a farce my relationship was and decided to leave my partner.

I haven't had a relationship since. The only relationships (flings) I've had have been with non-Aussies; I don't seem to have any connection with Aussie men - it's like I'm from a different planet not a different country.

And I miss that.

I miss the easy friendships I had in New Zealand. I miss the dance scene. I miss the compactness and nearness of everything. I miss the beaches.

Am I ready to go "home"? No. There's still things I want to do in Australia.

But I feel like I'm at a crossroads.

I want to trade my car for a campervan to make Orienteering weekends more comfortable. But I want an expensive one (a VW Kombi), which means I want to lease it through work. But that means staying with the same employer for another 3-4 years, and I don't know if I'm that motivated to stay.

We're moving offices next year, from Mooroolbark into St Kilda Rd. Which makes living in the Yarra Valley somewhat impractical. I'm wondering if I should buy a unit closer to the city (probably can't afford a house). This would also help my social life as I'd be closer to things I want to go to.

But I want to buy a 2 acre bush block too.

And travel around Australia.

So what have I achieved in the last 7 years:
* I've taken my scuba diving to another level (from Adv to Tech)
* I've taken my running to another level (ie, I can actually run for 5km)
* I've learned rock climbing
* I've learned orienteering
* I've learned to save money(!) but it helps having an income where there's some left over at the end of the month
* I bought a house on my own, and I'm halfway through a renovation. My partner never wanted to spend money on our house (until I left). I sometimes wonder if I've bitten off more than I can chew
* I've learned to be independent. Until I left, I'd always saw my future with someone else in it - almost as a requirement of "growing up". Now I know that's not a requirement, or a necessity
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